Barbara (Burk) McCarthy

Barbara lived many lives, each one with innate style and irresistible charm. She entered this world at Thomas Jefferson University Hospital in Philadelphia, Pennsylvania in September of 1938. Her parents James A. Burk Jr. and Frances A. Burk brought their precious infant to thrive at their loving home on Catherine Street in West Philadelphia where the extended theatrical family of Vaudevillian singers and dancers welcomed the first grandchild into the Burk fold. As a toddler, on many a late evening after the theater, Barbara’s beloved Aunt Sissie would swear that “the baby was awake” when she went upstairs to check on her. Against the wishes of Barbara’s mother Frances, Aunt Sissie quickly carried the Shirley Temple look-alike down to the frivolity of the lively kitchen, where Uncle Sid and the other entertainers were eating sticky buns, drinking coffee, and telling stories. It was no surprise that Barbara became a lifetime master storyteller.

Due to a job opportunity for her father, Barbara and her adoring parents then moved to Atlantic City, New Jersey, a place with special memories for James Burk, also known professionally as “Junior Burk.” During the roaring 1920’s Junior was a professional singer and headliner on Million Dollar Pier before transitioning to a career in Vaudeville at which time he toured the country as a tenor on the Keith Circuit.

In the 1940’s, Barbara embraced her adventures living on Chelsea Avenue, located just a few blocks from the beach. Barbara spent every evening with her cousin Carl at the boardwalk, where she wore pretty dresses and clutched 30 cents to purchase coloring books and candy. She also enjoyed the attractions at Steel Pier, including the diving horse act. Always a patriot, little Barbara instigated Victory Parades in her neighborhood and recalled looking out the window of her aunt Mildred and Uncle Carl’s first floor apartment on Chelsea Avenue, where she witnessed World War II United States Army soldiers marching in their combat boots. She flourished as a student at Brighton Avenue School, where she fondly recalled favorite teacher Mrs. Good planning a picnic on the roof.

Later, the small family, now including sister Maureen, born in 1944, moved to Springfield where she attended Holy Cross School and was a regular fixture at the famous Holy Cross Dance, a mecca for teenagers from Delco and beyond, where she enjoyed listening to the popular songs of the day by such musical artists as Joni James, Patti Page, and The Four Aces. Per tradition, as the lights rose on the dancefloor Goodnight, Sweetheart, Goodnight was the last record to be played.

From 1952 to 1956, Barbara attended Notre Dame Catholic Girls High School in Moylan. Barbara was a member of the sorority The Saggy Aggies. With girlfriends she regularly attended Tuesday night Sodality which included a perk that the girls were excused from homework by the Notre Dame nuns. Afterwards, they returned to each other’s houses to play records, dance, and drink Pepsi. Barbara enjoyed an active high school life, credited to her inseparable best friend Martha Cleary, who knew everyone, planned their social calendar, instigated escapades, and always had good fun.

In 1953, Barbara and her dance partner Bob Kelly from Grey & Arden Dance Studio, won the waltz contest at Bandstand at 45th and Market Streets in Philadelphia. The show was hosted by Bob Horn and Lee Steward. Dick Clark, before taking over the show in 1956 when it was renamed American Bandstand, sat at a table by the studio entrance and wrote out membership cards. Barbara received a record player as her prize. Grey & Arden Dance Studio was owned and operated by Madeline Burk, Barbara’s “Aunt Sissie” and Uncle Sid Pillet.

Barbara had a calling to be an educator. While at Notre Dame there was an announcement on the loudspeaker that any girl who wanted to teach should come to the principal’s office after school. Directly after graduation Barbara became part of the Archbishop’s Plan, a program of the Archdiocese of Philadelphia to supplement lay teachers in the Catholic Schools due to a shortage of nuns. Simultaneously Barbara studied at the night school of Villanova College while teaching during the day. For seven years, “Miss Burk” inspired fourth and fifth grade eager minds. She spent most of her teaching years at Mother of Divine Providence in King of Prussia, where in 1956 the Burks moved into a split level overlooking Norview Farms. A respected teacher, the students jostled to position themselves to carry her books to class. In addition to following the syllabus, with her own special flair she made her lessons instructional, creative, and entertaining. Barbara’s younger brother Jimmy, 12-years his sister’s junior, remembers the boys who wanted to hang out with him after school, just to get a peek at his beautiful sister.

As a teenager Barbara spent time vacationing in Ocean City, where she met Tom McCarthy who hailed from the Overbrook Section of Philadelphia and was a student at St. Thomas More High School for boys. Years later, the two became reacquainted. Tom recalls the day he met his future bride, “sitting prim and proper on a bar stool at Tony Marts in Somers Point.” One word began their romance. “Burk?” Said, Tom. The rest was history. Tom and Barbara married on September 29th, 1962, at St. Augustine Church in Bridgeport. Nine months to the day of their honeymoon in Vermont, Barbara and Tom welcomed their son Tommy to the family. Daughter Kelly, who Barbara named after a young actress on the television program Bachelor Father, starring John Forsythe, was born in 1965.

That same year, Tom told Barbara he was “bored” and wanted to take acting lessons. He went on to study for seven years at Hedgerow Theatre in Rose Valley. For the next fifty-years he spent a career as a professional working actor on the stages of all the Equity Theaters in Philadelphia. Barbara attended every opening night, afterwards gave Tom his notes and was embraced by the actors, directors, and producers who were charmed by her intelligence, wit, and kindness.

In 1972 Barbara and Tom became homeowners in Sea Isle City, where they have spent their summers with their young family.

By the late 70’s, Barbara did not want her young family uprooted to California for “the business” and husband Tom was content that they would raise Tommy and Kelly to have a normal happy childhood in Penn Wynne. Tom still managed to work regularly in television, where credits include Law & Order, West Wing, and The Wire. He also appeared in numerous films including, Blow Out and Random Hearts. Tom received the prestigious Barrymore Award for his performance of Willy Loman in Death of a Salesman, a performance that Barbara found no reason to give a note, because she said the production by Arden Theatre Company was “perfection.” Tom was also bestowed a Barrymore Lifetime Achievement award and Barbara enjoyed the wonderful relationships of the Philadelphia acting community, who became like another family.

Following retirement from teaching and having raised her own children, Barbara spent 20-years as a private nanny for professionals along the Main Line with middle school age children and teenagers in need of a warm and friendly face to greet them after school.

Barbara was a wonderful child, an adored sister, a loving and supportive wife, amazing mother, an inspiring teacher, and gifted writer whose byline appeared in numerous publications including the Philadelphia Daily News, the Main Line Times, and Main Line Today magazine.

A great beauty, Barbara’s countenance has been compared to Elizabeth Taylor and Jackie Kennedy. Her adoring nieces thought she was Snow White.

Speaking of Kennedy, in 1959 Barbara met John F. Kennedy when he was a senator seeking nomination to run for president. At the time, Barbara was working as a waitress at Horn & Hardart in Valley Forge. Barbara’s mother knew of the handsome and dashing Kennedy, and when local news announced he would be campaigning at H&H, mother and daughter stood in the parking lot and waited. Kennedy arrived, jumped on top of his chauffeured car, and leaned down to shake hands and his eyes sparkled at Barbara. Frances Burk elbowed her daughter and said, “He likes you.”

Barbara is survived by Tom McCarthy, her loving husband of sixty-two years, her son Tommy McCarthy and daughter Kelly McCarthy and son-in-law Eric Cecilio. Tommy and Kelly helped care for their mother. Tommy, a former bartender, a writer, and a chef prepared lovely meals for his mother. Kelly, a playwright and journalist and former actress, engaged in educational activities with her mother as Barbara enjoyed editing her daughter’s school papers, ever since Kelly returned to complete her college degree at Rowan University.

Just before Barbara’s passing, Eric was honored to serenade his mother-in-law in Italian with The Prayer. Barbara’s adoring brother, Kevin, sang the Birth of the Blues for his sister, a favorite song she previously had performed for him. Brother Jimmy Burk, a wordsmith like his sister, also sat bedside with Barbara on her final day of life and blessed her with great love and comfort.

Barbara is preceded in death by her mother Frances A. Burk (Nee Brophy), who died June 19th, 2009, and her father, James A. Burk who passed away in December 1974. Barbara is survived by siblings James A Burk III (Isabelle), Kevin Burk (Su Teears), Maureen Burk, numerous loving nieces and nephews and her Aunt Rosemary Becky, with whom she spoke with every day.

Barbara was called daughter, sister, Miss Burk, wife, and mother. Son Tommy says his mom made the ordinary extraordinary. Daughter Kelly, her mother’s twin, reports that she will continue to carry her mother’s indomitable sparkling spirit with her everywhere she goes.

Barbara Burk McCarthy regaled everyone she met with the best stories, the most interesting facts, and for the lucky ones, she cooked her famous homemade crab cakes and her creamy cheesecakes, which on one occasion caused a fight backstage between two hungry actresses. She regularly hosted after theatre cast parties. A self-made skilled cook, Barbara once had a marriage proposal for her homemade chicken salad. Barbara always served her family nightly dinners by candlelight, on heated plates with cloth napkins and a lace tablecloth.

When Barbara was a small inquisitive and talkative child living with her family on Catherine Street, her Uncle Charles once said, “Barbara, you must have been inoculated by a Victrola needle. “Uncle Charles,” she replied, “I only speak when I have something to say.”

Note: At Barbara’s request there will be a Celebration of Life event at a date to be decided in the spring.